


Love, she doesn't understand it until she realises...

by yoitsjxn



Category: Kingsman (Movies)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-01-03
Updated: 2018-01-03
Packaged: 2019-02-27 13:48:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,152
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13249515
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yoitsjxn/pseuds/yoitsjxn
Summary: Eggsy and Roxy are always there for each other, in every mission, every time of every day because they would rather spend time with each other rather than anyone else. That is until Eggsy opens up to her but she doesn't understand love until she gets a burning sensation every time she sees him after that one night, post mission.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> 2nd Ever Fanfic, am writing this while I'm in hiatus from the main one I'm writing because I think it will need more time. :) Enjoy

 

After a two-week long mission to expose the identity of a drug lord in China, Eggsy finds his comfort with Roxy in his arms. When he looks at the beautiful figure resting on his shoulders he sees a woman who he thinks he loves, he wonders _Does she see me like I see her_. Although they don't label themselves boyfriend and girlfriend yet they pretty much have all the attributes a perfect couple or at least a couple has. Such as the colossal amount of time they spend with each other on and off missions, whether it be in Eggsy's townhouse or Roxy's house or outside where they are taking long walks with their dogs and chat with some ice-cream or lollies, and this is only one of the reasons why people would assume they are a couple, not to mention their casual and comfortable way of  _relieving stress_  and I guess they bicker and argue a fair amount of times but no couple doesn't have at least one fight.However, a thought crosses his mind ever since he got this close with Roxy, this close in which they would talk to each other every time, every day. But today was different, he had built up enough confidence to ask her if she did want to be his boyfriend and if she did see him as someone to love, to be comfortable with. Not that they already are, but in a sense as a real couple, a significant other, not just a conquest to relieve stress.

Roxy had noticed he was deep in thought due to the way she always manages to read him like a book, but this time she was unaware on what was bothering him.  _Was he sad? Was he mad? Is he sick?_ Were some of the thoughts the fly through her head, so she gently asks "Eggsy are you alright?" He looked surprise as she had just interrupted as he was planning out what to say so he stumbles on his words "Yes I'm, er fine. No need to worry" he smiles a reassuring smile that she doesn't buy. "Oh Eggsy what is it this time, I know your not okay. You've barely said a word to me" Roxy replies fairly sternly just so its clear to Eggsy that shes not joking. Eggsy doesn't reply and after a couple of minutes Roxy slips her hand lower down his chest as to relax him but also to relax her. 

That's when Eggsy abruptly grabs her wrist, closes his eyes and asks "Do you.. a sigh escapes his mouth like, like me?" and a confused look appears on her face and she asks "What do you mean?". Eggsy had managed to collect his thoughts by now and asks "As in, do you just use me as a way to relieve stress? Be honest with me Rox, seriously" a desperate look now on his face. Roxy takes a minute to think about what she's about to say until the words just flow through her mouth "I mean, I like you Eggsy but not like  _that."_

A sting in his chest paralyses him for a moment as he is hurt from what she had just said to him. Obviously Roxy is an expert observer and notices this so she tries to reassure him "Eggsy, your obviously someone I care about and I wouldn't trade the world for you, maybe I just need time or something doesn't click." Eggsy tries to hold back the tears that are welling up in his eye and doesn't want to speak so he just nods calmly. He takes his hand off of her wrist and turns around in the bed and quietly says "Rox I don't feel like doing this tonight". Knowing he is already sad on what she had just said she doesn't argue or retaliate because she knows her friend so she just sighs replies "I'm sorry Eggsy I-" He had cut her off in a tone that seemed annoyed and angry and said "Not your fault Rox, It's your thoughts. You don't need to worry and be concerned because you don't feel the same way" and goes off to his hotel room that Merlin had booked in case someone had found out their place of hiding.

"Where are you going?" she asks sadly wanting his company for the night. "I just need some time, don't worry it's completely my fault for this argument tonight" he replies softly as if not to hurt her and strolls off. This leaves Roxy the rest of the night with her thoughts  _Why didn't I just tell him I do, I mean would I ever find another guy like him?  Maybe I'm just not ready. Nah, don't worry by the time we are on the flight to London he would be back to original Eggsy._ So she just sleeps. She loves Eggsy, she really does but maybe she just hasn't experienced a time where she felt it apart from their love-making but they were both high on adrenaline so they ignore it the morning after and enjoy their normal routine. She also hasn't experienced the feeling of longing and sadness because her and Eggsy barely were scratched up in missions, they were efficient, fast and nothing went in their way especially the way they worked together. This is until she would experience the next week.


	2. Not like every other Monday

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eggsy changes in behaviour and his and Roxy's routines change for this week, and of course Roxy notices..

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Second chapter writing, I'm still wondering if after I'm done ill slip in a cliff hanger just to keep it going. Anyways Enjoy :)

  
It's morning now and they have just left the hotel and a thick air of silence is between them. Eggsy is fixed with a stoic impression and doesn't say a word to Roxy, not even eye contact. Once they reach the plane Roxy had originally thought the night before Eggsy would be normal again but this isn't normal. None of it seems normal, an Eggsy is placed on a seat, silent and away from her, away from the couch on the private Kingsman jet they love and would normally lie down on cuddling and spooning so they could into a comfortable sleep and also to ease Roxy's tensions when flying. But all of those tensions came back to her without Eggsy by her side, Eggsy hadn't even looked at her once yet from that melancholy night but Roxy was too flustered and her gut told her not to say anything. She was practically shivering in her seat and Eggsy didn't look at her but she stole a couple glances at him, reading something on his phone. Little did she know Eggsy was always watching, from the corner of his eyes, seeing her like this broke his heart and he did exceptionally good at not moving a muscle and not showing emotion to look weak against Roxy and that was the least of her concerns.

Once they had gotten of the plane in a 16 hour flight, they would usually have to go to the Kingsman HQ to write their reports of the mission and get a small debrief from Merlin before they were allowed to go home. Of course Eggsy and Roxy would be writing their report together, it's second nature for them but again today was different. Eggsy was in his office swiftly writing his report and Roxy was in hers. This is extremely rare as both agents would normally be writing their report in Eggsy's office, there was even a space in his desk especially for her because it was so frequent that they would write their reports together as they enjoyed each other's company, busy chatting away. This was even more surprising because they were writing from a partnered mission, the only time they wouldn't do this is if Eggsy was still on a solo mission and vice versa. Roxy had even walked past his open door once just so she could get a glimpse at his eyes as she had not been able to that day and even though it was only 21 hours they hadn't had eye contact it felt like fucking decades. Luckily, she manages to just for a split second and smiles to Eggsy, but he doesn't smile back, just him looking back down and continuing his work was his reply.

Roxy was just finishing up her reports and when she hears noises of footsteps coming from the other room and she couldn't help herself but look from the door. She saw a dishevelled Eggsy handing his report over to Merlin and taking off in his company car. This hurt her to see and she couldn't look away from the car that was taking off and getting further and further away from the Kingsman HQ. Her train of thought was stopped by Merlin tapping her shoulder, asking "Finished Lancelot?" she shakes her head and replies "Nearly, Merlin sorry." And he replies with a simple "Not a problem lass." She actually found it hard concentrating writing the last parts of her report and it took her longer than expected because of the thought that Eggsy left her. She didn't like driving on her own or even with another person, she preferred Eggsy with her and in his car, especially since he could, it wasn't like he was out of the country he was perfectly able to wait for her and drive together like usual when they would either go to his house or hers. She didn't know what she liked so much about his car  _Was it the smell? Comfort? Or just Eggsy?_ she wondered after giving her report to Merlin and walking to her company car which had been collecting dust in the Kingsman garage. 

She decided tonight she would go to the pub, maybe find someone to  _relieve stress_ she had actually got annoyed and frustrated from what Eggsy was doing today and since he pretty much gave her the thumbs up to do anything and be with anyone she thought tonight would be the time to find someone to have fun.  _It can't only be Eggsy who makes me feel like this, can't only be Eggsy for me to relieve stress and feel.free._ she thought.

Once she had arrived at the pub she had found a guy to chat up and he was actually handsome, had good features such as a sharp jawline and hypnotising green eyes and looks which are rather similar to Eggsy. It was definitely the high intake of alcohol doing this to her, dancing next to a guy that wasn't Eggsy for a change. She couldn't help it and she took him home to try and get Eggsy out of her mind even though it was bothering her. A pain was tugging at both sides of her heart, _it doesn't feel right, it doesn't feel good_ she knows this and as it wasn't the guy's fault she faked an orgasm so at least he enjoyed whatever was happening in her house. She told him to leave in the most kind and gentle way as possible and to her surprise he did. For some reason that was the best feeling she had the whole night. The sex didn't do what it was supposed to she angrily deduced in her head it only made things worse. She couldn't sleep the entire night, couldn't close her eyes. Why was this bothering her,  _Why the fuck am I thinking of him I'm supposed to be enjoying myself goddammit. This was supposed to relieve stress not the opposite!_

Eggsy that night, couldn't sleep as well, she didn't notice or even see him at the bar but he was in fact there, but for a completely different reason. He wanted to go to the bar to see his old time friends Jamal and Ryan and drink his thoughts away, not get rid off them with another girl to replace Roxy. But he saw, he saw the way Roxy was so eager to have fun with another guy to replace him. So eager to take him home and out of the bar so they could do  _you know_   and this had crushed his heart and every other organ around it, he was in shock, in disbelief and in anger, but he couldn't do anything about it so he was left to his thoughts that night  _Looks like I was just a fucking conquest to her. Didn't mean shit. I mean why would I, just a street rat with a good looking face. Nothing special about me. She doesn't love you, did you see the way she wanted to fuck the other guy, dance with him in such a flirtatious way._ Angry thoughts rushed up his mind until he decides he is going to do something about it tomorrow. 

This obviously wasn't the truth, Roxy was so angry that Eggsy abandoned her so she decides to go to the bar to fuck a bloke. She actually didn't want to but the alcohol had taken over her body before she could stop it from happening. Of course, Eggsy didn't know that, how would he if Roxy didn't even know at the time. 


	3. A change needs to happen!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eggsy talks to Merlin about an upcoming partnered mission and as Merlin is a great, protective father figure for Eggsy, since Harry was dead he reluctantly accepts and is willing to pair him up with a new recruit / agent

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next Chapter! loved writing this one, change from the sadness :) and also sorry for wait, blame it on school.

Eggsy and Roxy had the week to themselves since their next mission would be Monday next week to continue their further investigation in the drug, crime syndicate. However, upon Eggsy's discoveries last night he feels its right to ask Merlin to change his partner as it may affect him in the field and more importantly, get his mind off of Roxy because he knows she would bring that night up. 

"Merlin!" Eggsy exclaims through the Kingsman corridor. "Ah, Eggsy. Surprised to see you here on your break" Merlin replies, genuinely surprised why he has showed up at HQ, firstly without Roxy and secondly on his time off. "Sorry for the disruption Merlin, but am I able to request a change of partner for the next mission?" Eggsy says as confident as he possibly can. Merlin the wise Kingsman decides not to ask, he doesn't want to infiltrate his private life even though he has noticed how distant Eggsy and Roxy were as soon as they got out of the plane. Merlin had recruited a new agent but not one to fill one of the knights position and since Eggsy's next mission wasn't particularly hard and could be done by Roxy and Eggsy so he reluctant replies "No problems Eggsy, This mission may be harder than normal because I have a new recruit who will be your partner next mission. I can give you two a chemistry test when she gets back at 4pm if you'd like". There is still a hint of hesitation in Eggsy but he replies excitedly "Thank you Merlin, yes i'll be here at 4!".

The rest of the day Eggsy lays in his townhouse couch feeling more relaxed to meet and work with someone who isn't Roxy especially because of what he had witnessed the night before. The new agent is known as Alice, because she isn't a knight she doesn't hold a knight's code name but just a different persona than her real name, of course to protect her identity. She happens to be a lot like Eggsy, actually from the same area and Eggsy wonders how he has never seen her before, then again he was always locked in his house from the point when his mother was with prick named Dean because of the amount of chores and work he had to do. Anyways, Alice was actually keen to meet Eggsy as well, Merlin had told her about the time when he saved the world in V-Day and she was greatly impressed.

Once Eggsy arrived at the Kingsman headquarters he had realised his phone had been bombarded with text messages from Roxy, since he had fallen asleep he hadn't realised that his phone had been buzzing so instead of arguing with her through text he just sent her a quick reply so she wouldn't turn up at his house or come find him. _"just going to hq to fix up stuff, dont worry im fine"_ was Eggsy's quick reply and of course Roxy had to make the conversation longer to escalate an argument. _"are u sure eggs i've been calling u for 2hrs and u weren't picking up"_ was Roxy's message, she was obviously worried due to the suspicious behaviour Eggsy has been acting recently. _"yes im fine, sorry i didn't call because i had fallen asleep"_ Eggsy stated. _"want me to check up on u Eggs?"_ Roxy was dying to see him, 24 hours, well more like 15 hours of not seeing him felt weird, she didn't want to spend her time with anyone else apart from Eggsy so she was hoping to meet him today. Eggsy getting fed up of this said _"no, its all okay im fine" . "Eggsy maybe i should come, please im so bored"_   she tried to make up any excuse just so she can meet him. _"For fucks sake Roxy im working just do something else"_ an angered Eggsy replied and he put his foot down that he won't text her anymore. Roxy, in defeat and guilt stopped trying and said _"sorry, please don't be mad at me eggs, i just wanted to spend time with u"._ Eggsy was now the one filled with guilt but swore to himself he won't reply but when he picks up his phone and tries to reply back Merlin invites him over to the lounge to meet his new partner.

"Hello Galahad, pleased to meet you. I've heard fantastic things about you." A woman who looked roughly the age of Eggsy and Roxy stood behind Merlin making her way towards Eggsy. "Hi, um agent Alice is it?" Eggsy replied a little nervously, sure the woman was beautiful but it was the fact that she had expectations Eggsy had to fulfil, she new about him and his capability and in this mission he needs to be as professional as possible to impress her. "Yes, I think Merlin has some chemistry tests for us so we can get along in this mission" she replied confidently. "Isn't he going to debrief us before the tests?" Eggsy questions as Merlin doesn't really switch his routines especially in a work manner. "He's doing that on Friday as well as 4 other agents who will be paired up as well" again confident and calm she replies. 

"Alright well nice to meet you, I hope we get along well!" Eggsy smirks giving her a light blush. She knows Eggsy is a handsome guy but seeing him in real life instead of imagining him was wonderful she liked his smile as it made her feel a little bit uneasy and took her of focus for a split second when she replies. "Nice to meet you too, I think we'll get along just fine" She smiles back but now she finds herself as the more nervous one when she replies. This is going to be one hell of a week and a lot to talk about...


End file.
